Just Blank Stares

Locked - 057

Thu, 24 Jul 2008 21:07:07 GMT

So this day sucked beyond all belief, and to think i was actually feeling better before. *sighs* Lets see, hmmm. First thing that happened today, my sister came running into our house at like 10am holding Jason screaming for an ambulance. He was screaming in pain, there was blood everywhere and Shannon was shaking like i leaf. She was so panicked that she also dropped him, i tried to take him from her so she could calm down. But she just sobbed and begged, 'no not my baby!' So i let her keep holding him as we checked him over. It seemed Monika's dog Buddy attacked him and bit his face. It was pretty bad, ripped his right nostril off and left three puncture wounds under his right eye. So one 911 call later, he's at the hospital. They can't stitch it back on because he's so young and it wouldn't work right, so he has to see a plastic surgeon. After that my mother and i still had to go to the doctors. It was our family doctor, and she told him about my huge panic attack and the car crash. And, okay i'll be honest. Since the crash, i haven't been as well as i've told people. I get dizzy spells and headaches yes, but i'm forgetting and mixing up words and stumbling around. I trip a lot, and my vision goes blurry. He thinks i may have brain damage, so on Monday i have someone coming to pick me up and take me for a bunch of neurological and memory tests. I also have to get yet another scan, i think a CT again. Since the last i got was an MRI. Or.... i dunno. Who the fuck names these scans, fucking retarded names. Like my mind isn't confused enough as it is.
Honestly this was the last thing i needed right now. He thinks that the panic attack could have been a side effect of the brain damage, even though i've had panic attacks my whole life. He thinks it's too much of a coincidence that i would be in a car crash and fracture my skull only to have the worst panic attack i've had in almost two years, only a couple weeks later. I don't know, maybe he's right. Only time will tell.
Anyway, my meds are knocking me out. So i'm going to go lay down right now, let them wear off. I'll be on again later.

Tue, 15 Jul 2008 00:02:15 GMT

Grrr, i HATE the new IJ theme. Now i have to go through about 20 odd journals and change all the themes back to what they were before. What is with people messing with a good thing? Seriously, if i ain't broke don't fix it.

Doctor Who - Midnight review/rant

Sun, 15 Jun 2008 03:21:53 GMT

Ok, my usual rant/review about the latest Doctor Who episode.

Well it seems like Davis is working to go out with a bang, and all i can say it that oh man am i ever gonna miss his writing! Sure Moffat is a great writer and has done a few really good episodes for the series on whole, but i always find myself going back to RTD's genius writing ability. Like this one, Midnight. Okay, after the two parter who else thought upon seeing the trailer for Midnight that it wasn't going to stand up to Silence in the library/Forest of the dead? I admit it, i thought it was going to be a lame follow up. But once again i was pleasantly surprised by RTD's work, it's my personal feeling the Midnight blew the last two episodes out of the water. It was amazing! This episode was in a confined space, with very little in ways of big showy effects and such. And yet this one, i think is the best episode of series 4 to date. The acting was so amazing, especially on David Tennants part. He usually puts on an amazing show, but in this episode he really just pulls out all the stops. Amazing, truly. And his almost 'non acting', meaning when he had to act with just his eyes. Was just breath taking, it can be very difficult to try to convey emotion without moving around and having the use of your whole body. But David did it flawlessly, and was really heartbreaking to watch.

Once again i loved the idea that RTD went when it came to the "monster". Yes there was an unknown entity on the ship, yes it took over Skye. But i adored that he made the bigger, more dangerous monster on the ship the humans. That seems to be something he likes to point out, which makes me think he has rather strong social opinions. The same idea was shown in Planet of the Odd, when Donna and the Doctor find out what the humans were doing to the Odd. And it's a strong message, and personally i feel a proper message. In the end, humans as a whole always end up being the biggest monsters in the room. Which is sad, and yet truthful at the same time. Everyone reacted exactly like 95 percent of people would have reacted in that situation, and it was rather horrific to watch in a way. I adore that Doctor Who can carry such strong social messages, but then again i tend to look and find those type of messages in things. Because, well i'm a dork who likes to read deeper into things than most lol.

Okay, on to my one bitch about the episode. Not enough Donna! *cries* Yes i know Tate was away filming Left Turn which is why she was so scarce in the episode, but still. I adore Donna, and the little bits she was in were great. Especially the end, where she walks up to him and just holds him. Again that goes right along with my 'non verbal communication' theory i have about the two of them. Which reminds me, i must update that with the newest episodes.

And i liked when the Doctor told Donna in all seriousness to not mimic him, i like that the episode left him shaking up by it. He so often goes through these horrible things and either is unaffected, or hides away any fear/pain/trauma he might have behind his goofy grin. I liked that this one ended with him very obviously being effected, scared and just slightly off.

Oh and who else loved the little professors assistant? Was she not the cutest ever? I liked her, and kept wanting to yell at people when they wouldn't listen to her.

All in all, a wonderful episode. And i can't wait until next weeks.

Doctor Who Picspam and rant!

Fri, 23 May 2008 23:35:35 GMT

I was REALLY bored today whilst trying to hide from my niece and nephew and started reading over the latest series of Doctor Who, and found myself listing all the reasons i adore Donna as a companion and how i'm going to be so horrible disappointed if she doesn't come back for the 2010 series. And from what i've heard in the rumor mill, is that she's not coming back after this series. *cries* Which is why i decided to kill some time breaking down my favorite moments between the Doctor and Donna, complete with pictures! Oh, and then i tossed in a few other random moments from this series that have stuck out in my mind. See, told you i was really bored. Anywho, needless to say there's spoilers for the entire series up to the latest episode 'The Unicorn and the Wasp'.
Oh and just quickly, yes i do realize i read WAY too much into things but it's what i'm good at. Breaking down things and seeing them in ways other's may not, well not everyone. I'd bet a good five bucks that Lorianne saw a couple of these scenes the same way, but that's just because she and i are so similar when it comes to our Doctor Who insanity lmao.

Partners in crime

"Donna?...." "Doctor!?"

Lol okay, so i think this bit EVERYONE loved. But it was just so perfect (not just because of how funny it was), it summed up what they're relationship was going to be like for the remaining series. From the moment they saw each other it an was over the top miscommunication, and yet they still managed to understand each other perfectly. And i think that sums them up exactly, half the time they're either fighting or not understanding one another, like there's a barrier between them. And yet they work perfectly together, because the get one another in the most basic of senses despite the vocal words that tend to get in the way and that's really the underline of most of the conversations. What they aren't saying, or don't have to say because they just get one another.

The fires of Pompeii

"Nothing can survive it. Certainly not us." "Never mind us."

This bit, oh god how i love Donna. She's one of the only companions (besides Jack) that's ever actually been willing to die, now i know there's a bit of an argument about Rose willing to because in the first series when the Doctor said he could save the world but lose her, and she was like 'do it'. But I honestly believe just watching that scene that she knew that he'd get her out of it, she always did. Just watching her, she had such a fricking trust in the man that she always knew he'd find a way. But Donna didn't, it was her first trip and she literally thought they were going to die. And this was before she knew his talent for getting in and out of near death situations with a odd ease. Just watching her, she knew she was about to die. And she was willing to let it happen, and what's more. She was willing to share his burden, she pressed the lever as well. She was just as much to blame, something that just made her more of a stronger companions in my eyes. Especially after making all that stink about how it was wrong to let everyone die and then to go and help kill them, just so he wouldn't have to carry the guilt alone. Brilliant!

"Just someone. Please. Not the whole town. Just save someone."

Oh and then this bit! She finally understood what the Doctor felt, carrying all that guilt. Knowing they caused it, and bless her she couldn't deal with it. I adore her begging him to just try and right something, a tiny piece. If only to let her sleep at night without the thought of 20,000 deaths on her hands. Her telling him it's not fair, and that for once he could save someone, anyone. And fuck, ya know he had the power. Good for her, making him go back.

Planet of the Ood

"I spent all that time looking for you, Doctor, because I thought it would be so wonderful out here... I want to go home."

This bit i really liked, which is saying something because so far this episode has been my least favorite one. Not sure why, just meh. I felt it was mediocre, but anyway! Yes this bit where Donna essentially realizes that no matter where you go, or what you do. There's one undeniable truth in the universe, humans as a collective whole are monsters. The things they do, and think are alright. And the fact that everyone turns their heads away from it because it's easier to live with a lie than with truth. She just wants to go home and pretend she never knew, because as they say. Ignorance is bliss.

The Sontaran Stratagem

"You're just popping home for a visit, that's what you mean." "You dumbo."

The miscommunication it knows no bounds! I adored this bit, because it was like i said about the first bit. Words got in the way, and she just stood there because she knew he'd know sooner or later. See that's what the Doctor gets for being so damn chatty lol. And i loved how she just stood there, nodding. Like 'yeah, he'll get it. wait for it, yep there it is.' And then to actually tease him about it! Oh, they're amazing.

The posion sky

"Oh, you are brilliant, you are." "Shut up."

This part, i just loved how flippantly Donna tosses aside his praise. Rose or Martha always just basked in the Doctor's praise, grinning and all happy that they did good. Like little puppies lol. Not that i don't love them as well, because i do. But to be honest their constant need to have a pat on the head from him could get a tad annoying at times. And Donna, she's just like 'whatever, don't need ya'. She knows she'd good, that's one of the things that's so great about her. She's got no doubt, she knows she's a match for the Doctor and she knows that he needs her. There's never a doubt, gotta love a mature (to a point lol) companion!

SMACK!

This, this right here is what i mean about not needing to talk. She was worried, she was sacred. She thought she had just watched her best friend swan off and die, and when he comes back what does she do? She hauls off and whacks him one! Why, because fawning like Martha was or Rose would have just isn't her style. She told him everything she needed to tell him with that one simple movement. 'You scared me shitless, you ever do that again you stupid man and I'LL kill you'. And he just looks at her, knowing what she meant. And then she just kneels down to hold onto his arm. See no words, nothing getting in the way. Just simple, and honest. And it spoke volumes.

The Doctor's Daughter

"I tell you something, Doctor, something I've never told you before. I think you're wrong."

I love this, she's not really challenging him in her usual way. But she's telling him flat out that she thinks he's wrong. Something that few do, because apparently he's always right. But what about when he's not? Donna sure as hell isn't going to just let him off without telling him when he's not, nope she'll let him know. And that is one of the many ways Donna is his equal instead of his 'assistant' as they use to be called in old Who. Nope, she's right up there on his level. Willing to put him in his place.

The Unicorn and the Wasp

"Harvey Wallbanger?!" "Well i don't know!"

Again can you say miscommunication!? I just adore this scene, it's so brilliant! It's not only a fricking hoot to watch, omg so funny! But it's also so them ya know. The way they are together, their antics i could never see Rose or Martha doing. Jumping around, playing charades to save his life. And i love how Donna's just really getting into it, whereas the other's would have been panicking. But at this point it's like she knows, shit he'll be fine. God how i love them!

And now for my random favorite moments, just because apparently i haven't prattled on enough about Doctor Who yet lol

LMAO! Oh i love the idea that he fights off the creatures with a water pistol! And oh the irony that he's finally using a gun, even though he hates guns with a passion. True it's a plastic yellow gun, but a gun no less. Lol, shame on you Doctor!

"Are you my mummy?"

OMG, ok who didn't love this fricking scene? No one, that's right. This scene was just epic! Plus i love any and everything that connects the Tenth Doctor to the Ninth Doctor, because even though Ten is amazing. I'm a total and complete Nine fangirl. I can't help it, so this just made me giggle and squee at the same time.

Double Martha! Ah save me, i may die from the hotness! Yes, Martha is freaking HOT! She's the only one i think that's been hot (in my eyes anyway), well not counting Romana II from old Who. Who to be honest, wasn't really hot. She was just so fucking cute! Man i loved her, but yeah anyway. Martha, geez she's one yummy girl. And omg look there's two, so yeah i loved this scene just for my own gratuitous reasons lmao.

I adored the little friendship that Martha and the Hath had. It was just so cute, it was just so totally Martha to befriend an injured half fish-man. Ok so to be fair Rose would have befriended him as well, but wouldn't have looked half as cute whilst doing it lol.

Oh!!! Poor Hath! Poor Martha. I loved this scene just because i felt it was so right that Martha actually mourn the Hath. Most would watch and be like, 'it's a fricking fish alien!' But i thought it was fitting, he deserved to be mourned. He saved her life, he lost his own in the process. He needed to be mourned, he deserved to be mourned. And dammit, if Martha didn't come through. Plus the scene was brilliantly done, her acting was just so heartbreaking. Pain and guilt, the perfect crying scene. Even if there were very little actual tears, which is actually one of my acting pet peeves. If you're going to sell it, the fricking cry man! It's not that hard, i was trained to do it when i was still in grade school. But anyway, that's not the point. The scene still worked and i loved it.

Oh i'm such a sucker for a good death scene, and this one was just so beautiful. Dying in the Doctor's arms, him clutching to the hope that she might regenerate. Tennant did so wonderful in this scene, he really looked like a man finding and losing something all at the same time. Something that's not very easy to convey i must admit, and he just nailed it. True if she had been fatality wounded there should have been some blood, any blood really. But it's Doctor Who, it's like a cartoon. There's hardly ever any blood, and when there is it's just a tiny bit.

Hehehe, oh Donna! Man she's so cute sometimes. I loved how she just sat in the back, not actually doing anything. Just eating her grapes, watching the story unfold. She really wasn't even needed in the scene, and yet every time she chimed in with her 'so she killed him?' she just managed to steal the scene. Too cute, too funny. Oh and have i mentioned that i love Donna? Oh well, i'm saying it again. I LOVE DONNA! Hehe!

Yes i realize that was long and pointless, and if you actually got to the end of this i applaud you. Have a cookie *hands out space cookies*

In Loving Memory

Wed, 14 May 2008 18:29:15 GMT

The music game

Fri, 11 Apr 2008 23:56:03 GMT

Rules:

1. Shuffle your play list.
2. Using the first 35 songs, no matter how embarrassing, post your favorite lyric from that song. (try not to put the song title in the lyrics unless you really have no choice)
3. Have your friends guess the song and artist. No using lyric search engines, that's cheating.
4. Once that song and artist has been guessed, strike it out and beside the lyric place the name of the song, the artist, and who guessed it.

(Taken from my old old journal on GJ. I've never actually had my list fully guessed before, which makes me think i'm possibly too eclectic lol. There's rock, pop, country, metal, folk, r&b and everything else in between. Well lets see how far this gets this time 'round)

1 - Remember that night at my window, When I waved at you? I must have been only five or so, but I never forgot you.

2 - Standing by the ruins of your soul, that cries for some more meaning. Wondering when you have become so cold.

3 - Every time I make a run, girl, you turn around and cry. I ask myself why, oh why. See, you must understand I can’t work a 9 till 5.

4 - Is this real enough for you? You were so confused. Now that you've decided to stay, we'll remain together.

5 - Heaven holds a sense of wonder. And I wanted to believe that I'd get caught up when the rage in me subsides.

6 - Desperate, I will crawl. Waiting for so long. No love, there's no love. Die for anyone, what have I become?

7 - Now that I know this is beyond my control, 'cause I could never turn my back away.
Now that I see you, I can never look away.

8 - But I need to know, will you stay for all time? Forever and a day. Then I'll give my heart 'til the end of all time. Forever and a day.

9 - Listen, my child, you say to me. I am the voice of your history. Be not afraid, come follow me. Answer my call and I’ll set you free.

10 - I've given a lot of thought to, the nights we use to have. The days have come and gone, our lives went by so fast.

11 - If you can't pacify me I will break your bones. You think I'm bluffing, just try me. I will never forget the words you used to ensnare me. Till my dying day, you'll suffer for this I swear.

12 - Can’t keep believing, we’re only deceiving ourselves and I’m sick of the lies.

13 - Borrowed from a dream, that I use to know. All my friends were there, We watched the world explode.

14 - I met a girl who sang the blues and I asked her for some happy news, but she just smiled and turned away. I went down to the sacred store where I’d heard the music years before, but the man there said the music wouldn’t play. American Pie by Don McLean - fading_xhopex

15 - ~~I know I’ve got a face in me, points out all my mistakes to me. You’ve got a face on the inside too, your paranoia’s probably worse.~~ Papercut by Linkin Park - fading_xhopex

16 - Even though I know. I don’t want to know. Yeah I guess I know. I just hate how it sounds.

17 - As my heart holds you, just one beat away. I cherish all you gave me, everyday. Cause you are mine. Forever love. Watching me, from up above.

18 - Deep down it hides. Making life a grind. I dreamed of this so long. This used to feel so strong.

19 - If your love could be caged, honey I would hold the key. And conceal it underneath the pile of lies you handed me, and you’d hunt those lies. They’d be all you’d ever find,
that’d be all you’d have to know for me to be fine.

20 - See, I don't know why I liked you so much, I gave you all of my trust. I told you I loved you, now that's all down the drain.

21 - That little bitch with her head held so high talking shit, and I cut myself so I could feel something I know is not a lie.

22 - Some days I feel broke inside, but I won't admit. Sometimes I just wanna hide, 'cause it's you I miss. And it's so hard to say goodbye, when it comes to this.

23 - You woke up screaming aloud. A prayer from your secret god. You feed off our fears and hold back your tears.

24 - Did I say that I loathe you? Did I say that I want to, leave it all behind?

25 - She used to run track back in high school, now she tricks off the track right by school. She takes a loss cos she don't wanna see her child lose. So respect her, and pay up for the time used.

26 - I heard he is missing in the river now. They say he is nowhere to be found. I hope she sang the sweetest lullaby, so that he was calm when he went down.

27 - Go where you want to go. So no one ever knows. Only what we decide. Is it gone? Has it died?

28 - Feeling guilty, worried, waking from tormented sleep. This old love has me bound but the new love cuts deep. If I choose now, I'll lose out, one of you has to fall. And I need you, and you.

29 - I can't escape myself. So many times I've lied, but there's still rage inside. Somebody get me through this nightmare, I can't control myself.

30 - You made me feel so small. What are you the silent type? It's a funny thing, how certain people change.

31 - After all I've seen, piecing every thought together. Find the words to make me better. If I only knew how to pull myself apart.

32 - You'll never live this life that I live. I'll never live the life that wakes me in the night. You'll never hear the message I give. You'll say it looks as though I might give up this fight.

33 - ~~Losing my sight, losing my mind. Wish somebody would tell me I'm fine. Nothing's all right, nothing is fine. I'm running and I'm crying.~~ Last Resort by Papa Roach - fading_xhopex

34 - Don't pretend, I think you know I'm damn precious. And hell yeah, I'm the mother fucking princess.

35 - Guess I'm not smart. I let you unnerve me, I let you control me. Afraid the truth would hurt me, when it's you that hurts me more.

Unlocked - 002 // 50 Torchwood icons

Mon, 18 Feb 2008 04:30:08 GMT

Icons for for 50icons

Subject: Jack Harkness/Ianto Jones
Status: 0/50
Themes: 0/25
Notes: This is just the place holder, i've yet to post icons. Check back for updates.

- Textless are not bases
- Credit is a must
- Comments aren't needed, but totally nice to get.

01 forever	02 alone	03 hurt	04 cry	05 happiness

06 romantic	07 silly	08 beautiful	09 brave	10 gone

11 blue	12 kisses	13 mine	14 home	15 secrets

16 hold on	17 angel	18 cute	19 weird	20 sexy

21 cool	22 angry	23 evil	24 strong	25 sweet

26 artist’s choice	27 artist’s choice	28 artist’s choice	29 artist’s choice	30 artist’s choice

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Unlocked - 001

Tue, 05 Feb 2008 02:06:31 GMT

Ok so i finished my 100 icons for btvsicons100 over on livejournal.com
It only took me 2 and a half weeks to do, which wow. I thought i'd take a hell of a lot longer to finish them, but i guess i surprised myself. I've already picked up another subject and once i'm approved i shall start making those as well. But as of right now, here is what i've got.

Subject: Dawn Summers - Finished as of 02/04/08
Status: 100/100
Themes: 50/50

Preview:

Comments are not needed, but are totally nice to get ^_^ But credit is a must, please and thank you.

50 T H E M E D

001 : solitude	002 : lyrical	003 : oops	004 : dark	005 : bright

006 : ache	007 : cry	008 : disgust	009 : pain	010 : panic

011 : discovery	012 : whole	013 : no text	014 : smile	015 : laugh

016 : blue	017 : red	018 : green	019 : killer	020 : hero

021 : sleepy	022 : happy	023 : sad	024 : naughty	025 : bloody

026 : stained	027 : innocent	028 : slayer	029 : find me	030 : stake

031 : fight	032 : chosen one	033 : vampire	034 : rebel	035 : trust

036 : betrayal	037 : whatever	038 : my love	039 : sweet	040 : sour

041 : torn	042 : run	043 : not now	044 : snarky	045 : monochrome

046 : hot	047 : cold	048 : enemies	049 : determined	050 : heaven

50 A R T I S T ' S C H O I C E

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Icon Count : 100 / 100 Last update: 02/04/08

Thu, 24 Jan 2008 00:29:36 GMT

Comment to be added, there are no rules.
I don't care how old you are or how you type, just as long as you aren't here to start any shit with me.

Formerly located at greatestjournal.com

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